when you try to land a book deal about the time you masturbated in a tree, you deserve to go to jail.
“What? Put ice cubes in a bowl and add cauliflower, celery sticks stuffed with cheese? How is that accomplished? Then add olives? What the hell is the result, and is it even conceivable that a kid would eat it? Should eating it even be attempted by anyone of any age? Do you eat the ice cubes, too? What is this?” —The Cheese-Time Continuum — Mike Nelson
“BMI: Body Mass Index. Something horrid made up by doctors to make me feel ashamed.” —Stephen Fry » Blog Archive » Wii is a kind of magic